`Report - Smokkelschmuggelsmuggle`
shows & archive

`Report - Smokkelschmuggelsmuggle` , Wapke Feenstra (ENG )

Lots of brown-haired hunting dogs and some true guard dogs. Lots of Hungarian Kuvasz mixes. And Dachshunds too, long and short haired. Haven’t seen any Golden Retrievers yet, or Jack Russells. Dogs popular at home, like the one in the Cesar dog food commercial, aren’t here. On the whole people have big dogs (too big) and lots of mongrels. Poodle and shepdog mixes are common. Pit bulls only in certain neighbourhoods.

I stand still for a moment and look out at a small group of soldiers. The director, who only yesterday sat casually behind a table covered with too many books, is now standing in a grey pinstripe suit beside a man with a very large mouth and three double chins. He seems a weighty figure. Who are these old- and middle-aged citizens? The triple-double chin gives a speech. A lot of the press have come. I write busily standing between a real TV camera, lots of Nikons and a few digitals. Is my Canon EOS 500 good enough to make an impression? A woman introduces herself to me enthusiastically, I say I only understand English, she trickles away. She’s with a man in plain clothes. A litte futher along stand two more reporters with notebooks. Everyone now looks in the other direction. I really should learn Hungarian. The director points to an object in the hall, the people smile and look at the thing. Beside it is a chair with a red ribbon around it. In the first room are all kinds of engines. The exhibition is colour coded: orange is art, blue is science, green is design, red is other. In the first room there are lots of blue but not many orange marks. In the second room as well. There are lots of old computers in Room 2 and a lovely Victor Vaselery. Didn’t know he was Hungarian. The director walks around with a hollow back. A man and his wife, who’s in a colourful blue suit, are being filmed for television. I take a picture of this tableau. All the captions are in Hungarain. I must find the group again. They’ve left. I find lots of blue and orange in the first room on the left, which contains all kinds of military stuff. Mainly technology. Philips sponsored the video film being shown in the military gallery. The soldiers stand beside the exercise equipment in Room 3. The guard (female) asks to see my camera pass; cameras are only permitted with a permit. I name the name of the director and point to myself. It helps. A woman soldier is walking around Room 3. The exercise room is code green and sometimes orange. There are also some old radios. I’ve already turned towards the large, round room where Georg is showing three men a wooden camera. They’re not with the group. They are listening to him. The most artistic of them nods emphatically several times. Georg’s wife and children shuffle through the image. The soldiers are still standing in the exercise room. The wife who has just been filmed smiles at the woman who introduced herself. Not everything is Hungarian. The prohibiting sign – nicht berühren – bitte nicht auf den stuhl sitzen – I can read. Otherwise a few brand names and the recognisable functions of the things.

We turn right into the large, round room. Georg is standing on the left, out of hearing range. He explains something else, points to a note and talks. I must concentrate on my group, they move off. The soldiers have all sorts of thin, stitched colours above their beast pockets. White is dominant, and red and green, but remains a multicoloured mesh of stripes. In the room to the right there is a lot of red. This means other. This is the first time I see this code. The red code has been applied to handmade equipment such as the old helmet which has been used as a shovel. Why hasn’t this got a blue label? The group goes into a side room. This room has a lot of orange and a little blue. Next is a darkened room which has been coded exclusively orange. Art then. Now pass all sorts of things and go straight into the military room which I had peeped into earlier. The introductory man with the tripple-double chin is rocking backwards and forward beside the director. The photographers keep clicking. Would soldiers be happy about being coded blue? I see that a number of soldiers have three rows of colours above breast pockets. We quickly pass the first optical room containing lots of (old) cameras. Georg’s wife and children are standing in front of some wooden cameras. The oldest girl waves at us. By now the group has scattered somewhat and is thouching or looking into everything. They are now clearly more relaxed, now they have done the speech in the military room. Next is a dark room in which all kinds of colour codes are to be found. And then a room without any green. Georg is introduced to the group by the director. All the journalists start writing frantically. The man with the tripple-double chin is spoken to about the possibility of an eye bath. He listens. Then his mobile rings. What a shame! Who does eye baths? I get a strong whiff of garlic now that I am standing in the group. The director takes off his glasses. The press gathers round him. The director has an eye bath. The tripple-double chin comes back and asks questions. Restrained hilarity ensues. The director solicits and invites others for some eye washing. People are beginning to talk animatedly amongs themselves. Georg too has a quick eye bath. He invites people to have a go on the relaxation mat. A journalist asks a few determined questions. The director answers. Everyone moves towards the exit, a few journalists stand around asking questions. They carefully inspect the preparation Georg is recommending. The little girl walks in thighter and thighter circles around her father, then holds him thight. I follow the journalists downstairs and into the café. Yet another speech. I go to watch the eye baths. There is now a guard lying on the relaxation mat. He is resting after his eye bath and has a bag of sand on his eyes. I sit on his chair and look out at a sculpture of the husband of Roza El Hassan. The crossbreeding has not been documented. However, the surroundings have been extensively photographed and there is now much more to say about the eye baths in the MEDIA MARKT and C3.